We glimpse the tip of the iceberg of the hidden face of sexual harassment by religious leaders through the story of Laura, a 29-year-old singer in a worship group.

“The worship leader started by complimenting how I sang. Then he always wanted to talk to me after services and would send me messages at night. When he asked me for a 'more natural' photo, I realised that his behaviour was no longer pastoral. I began to feel very uncomfortable and told him so, but he continued to send me messages every day. I felt dirty and guilty. I didn't know how to stop it”.

Sexual harassment and abuse by people in positions of power within religious contexts is a silent and persistent reality that is often covered up by misguided respect, fear of public exposure or spiritual manipulation.

Although this issue is beginning to emerge thanks to the testimony of courageous victims and the work of support organisations, it remains one of the most painful taboos within faith communities.

An uncomfortable truth that cannot be silenced

Various reports show that only 10–15% of cases of abuse by religious leaders are formally reported; the rest remain silent.

According to the Sexual Abuse in Church Statistics' report 2025, around 70% of victims do not report what happened, mainly because they fear not being believed or facing reprisals.

However, even if these behaviours are not legally criminal, they are abusive and clearly reprehensible in Christian settings.

In many religious settings, a culture of silence still prevails. We need to educate people and change mindsets so that we can move towards a culture of speaking out. This will help to bring justice and restoration to both perpetrators and victims.

So far, the tendency has been to rehabilitate the perpetrator while leaving the victims buried in their pain and silenced. This must change.

How does abuse begin in faith contexts?

The main tools used are social media, primarily Facebook, Instagram and WhatsApp.

Sexual harassment from positions of power often comes under the guise of genuine interest and then goes further. It starts with comments such as:

• “You sang so well today; your voice is amazing”


• “I love talking to you about personal stuff”


• “You have a special beauty when you minister”


• “I see we like the same things”


• “Can you send me a photo of yourself?”

From there, if the victim does not stop it,often because they do not know how to, due to respect for the leader or emotional confusion;the tone changes:

• “If I weren't married, I would choose you”


• “My wife isn't as passionate as you”


• “My marriage isn't going well”


• “I'd love to see you in your pyjamas”

These are real, documented statements taken from the testimonies of victims of religious abuse, collected by organisations that support them.

They clearly show escalating manipulation and boundary violations, taking advantage of hierarchical or spiritual superiority.

“Spiritual abuse is built on trust, admiration and power. It is one of the most difficult types of abuse to detect and report because victims often feel guilty, confused or afraid of harming the community”, points out Andrea Paredes, a psychologist and expert in religious trauma.

How to identify an abusive spiritual leader

Various studies and testimonies agree on certain behavioural patterns that should raise red flags:

1. An overly personal bond: They take an interest in your private life, constantly seek you out, and make you feel 'chosen'.

2. Breaking physical and emotional boundaries: They hug you insistently and comment on your appearance or clothing.

3. Spiritual manipulation: They use verses or supposed divine revelations to justify their closeness.

4. Encouraging secrecy: They ask you not to share their messages or calls and contact you late at night.

5. Acts like a victim: They talk about their 'marital problems' or loneliness to justify their emotional dependence.

6. Similar stories: They have had other 'special friendships', but these have never been formally reported.

You are not alone and you are not to blame

Spiritual abuse almost always begins with small breaches of trust by people in positions of power, which gradually become normalised.

That is why identifying these signs early on can prevent many people from experiencing the silent pain caused by covert harassment from people who should act as guides, not predators.

The faith community should be a refuge, not a trap. No one has the right to cross the boundaries of your body or conscience under any spiritual justification.

You don't need proof to speak up. Your discomfort is sign enough that something is wrong; you are not exaggerating.

If you suspect that you are being emotionally, spiritually or sexually manipulated, trust your instincts. Talk to someone outside the harasser's circle of influence.

Asun Quintana, philologist, evangelical pastor in Madrid, and president of Plataforma Seneca Falls.