Talking face-to-face to understand the world

First came email and text messages, then social media and instant messaging. In our day-to-day lives, we write far more than we did two decades ago. And we do it digitally, of course (at this stage, I have serious doubts about my ability to write by hand!)

In 2019, one study caught my attention that discussed ‘Generation Mute’: those who felt anxious about having to answer phone calls. 94 per cent of those aged between 14 and 24 preferred simply to ‘text’, even to their parents or their best friends.

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[destacate]Will I jeopardise my relationship with this person if I express my opinion on this complex issue? Could I avoid awkward situations by keeping my communication strictly digital?[/destacate] Apps from the big tech companies are pushing in the same direction: talking face-to-face becomes less and less necessary. Video (for example, live streams by gamers) and voice messages (on WhatsApp, which are very popular) have their place in the new model of communication, but with them, too, physical presence is fading away.

The widespread use of AI chatbots (ChatGPT, Gemini, Claude…) only reinforces the trend towards resolving any issue via digital writing tools. We have more answers to our queries, more information, and more tasks sorted out. Everything is faster, more effective, more concise. And with less conversation.

In Spain, where I grew up and live, much of social life takes place outdoors, and going to the park to play remains a daily routine for most children. But the sharp polarisation (on politics, society, the economy, identity…) actively fuelled by algorithms in all our online communications now has become a national scourge: it both causes and reinforces the feeling that face-to-face conversations carry risks.

Particularly for Generation Z—now mature and taking on leadership roles in society or the church—there is always a lingering concern. What topics can I actually discuss with my peers or friends? Will I jeopardise my relationship with this person if I express my opinion on this complex issue? Could I avoid awkward situations by keeping my communication strictly digital?

[destacate]Being together grows our wisdom. Engaging in dialogue is reflecting the image of a God who became incarnate to look us in the face[/destacate]We journalists, incidentally, also face this dilemma: when we tend to reduce communication with our sources to an email or a Telegram message.

So here we are. Family agreements that aren’t reached because they weren’t calmly discussed in person. Decisions in the local church that weren’t made because the key people could never be brought together to have that difficult conversation. Friendships that fade because a disagreement via messaging app wasn’t resolved through a face-to-face conversation of reconciliation.

But deep down, we may still sense that talking in person is the best way to truly understand the world around us. Because, as the biblical worldview proclaims, we humans are relational beings who must not disconnect our thinking from physical realities. Being together grows our wisdom. Engaging in dialogue is reflecting the image of a God who became incarnate to look us in the face.

So, who should you message to meet up for a beer (or a smoothie) and resume an important conversation, calmly and face to face?

Joel Forster, director of Evangelical Focus. This article was first written for Finnish magazine Uusi Tie. 

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