Some of the latest data collected speak of a crisis of self-esteem that affects half of the world's population. “True self-esteem is much deeper than just hugging yourself”, says psychologist Lidia Martín.
Some data suggest that almost half of the population has self-esteem problems. / Photo: [link]Hert Niks[/link], Unsplash, CC0.
Self-esteem is in crisis. Several voices and publications point in this. For example, a document published by the private British company The Body Shop, which was acquired in November 2023 by a German investment fund, has recently pointed out that half of the world’s population has low levels of self-esteem.
According to its Global Self Love Index, the company has scored an overall average of 53 points on a scale of 0 to 100. “This means that nearly one in two people worldwide fall on the negative side of the scale, identifying more with self-doubt than self-esteem”, the report reads.
Among the countries with the highest self-esteem “deficits”, according to this cosmetics, skin care, and perfume company, are South Korea (45 out of 100), France and Saudi Arabia (48) and China and Spain (49), while the best-placed countries are Denmark and Australia (62), and the United States (61). Up to 60% of respondents, says The Body Shop, would like to have "more self-respect".
If this data are reliable, they would be surprising, especially in the current context in which individual freedoms and achievements are seen as a measure for progress. “All the hype about self-esteem, expressed in every possible way, does not seem to be taking hold in society”, says psychologist Lidia Martín, in Madrid, Spain. “Either this culture of self-esteem does not really have as much basis as it seems to have, or what is being built on the one hand is being dynamited on the other”, she says.
For Martín, this coincides with “what we observe in the consulting room, where low levels of self-esteem tend to go hand in hand with many of the problems that bring people to seek professional help”.
[photo_footer]Lidia Martín, psychologist in Madrid, Spain.[/photo_footer] In fact, the abovementioned data coincide in time and space with those of the World Health Organisation (WHO), which indicate that around one in seven young people aged between 10 and 19 suffer from a mental disorder.
According to the survey, the Generation Z (born between 1997 and 2002) has the lowest self-esteem, with up to 41% of respondents saying so.
The data also point to a link between low self-esteem and increased use of social media sites. For example, up to 32% of those who say they use social media a lot also admit they have low self-esteem, compared to 19% of non-users. “In general, people say that social media influencers, celebrities and advertising models are the biggest contributors to low self-esteem levels”, the report reads.
“In an age in which we are so exposed to social media, where it is so easy to compare ourselves and where, furthermore, everyone tells things according to how they want to project their image to the outside world”, these contradicting trends are “not really surprising at all”, stresses the Christian psychologist.
Lidia Martín points out that “networks and technology make it much easier for us to make visible and project in an extraordinary way what was there long before”, and considers that "they are a great showcase with a giant amplifier”. “They are 'expanders', but they only show what was there in the first place. A bottle doesn't ring, no matter how much you shake it, if it doesn't have something in it”.
Social media and its expansion in the last two decades have “stirred up in an incredible way some of the things that were ‘dormant’ inside us, and now they are coming out loud and even shouting. They are a clear demonstration of that famous biblical principle that out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks, our media are a technological megaphone”.
[photo_footer] The link between self-esteem problems and social media is particularly pronounced in younger people / Visuals, Unsplash.[/photo_footer]
The problem has to do with the definition of self-esteem. “We are still determined to conceive of our relationship with ourselves in the wrong way”, she points out. “Self-esteem is not this kind of unicorn that we have been told about ad nauseam and that appears when you embrace who you are, just like that. Deep down, we are not designed to embrace any thing, or any practice, or any speech”.
“Talking is free, publishing on networks saying or projecting whatever you want is also free, but everyone at home, in the end, knows what they have”, says Martín. “You can deceive the viewer, but then you go home with yourself and you see your lights and shadows”.
For this reason, the psychologist adds, “true self-esteem has to do with something much deeper than simply 'hugging yourself' or striving to get along with yourself and love yourself It is about being aware of who we are, with its lights and darks, and being much more realistic than is currently the norm”.
Looking at ourselves “mainly creates doubts, and that's why we don't usually like silence or darkness, because that’s where we find ourselves, whatever we say on social networks", she stresses.
This concept of self-esteem, Martín explains, leads us to “defend ourselves tooth and nail without any really solid criteria, just for the sake of 'embracing' ourselves, whatever we are talking about”.
“I find myself more often with false self-esteem, which has elaborated a discourse of solidity outwardly but which is not sustainable inwardly, than with truly balanced understandings of oneself that generate positive affections in us and in others”, Martín underlines.
Thinking about what external criteria to establish, one that seems fundamental to the psychologist is that of the biblical text. “My favourite 'definition' of what I consider to be correct self-esteem comes from Paul when he says: 'By the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace has not been with me in vain' (1 Corinthians 15:10)”, she says.
This statement, she says, “synthesises three key elements that only the Christian can really express so powerfully”. “First of all, it makes me see that what I have is not mine, but that I have received it undeservedly from God. It also enables me to see that what I have is what I have, that is, I am not more, but not less, and there is no need for false modesty or 'imposing'. Finally, it leads me to make sure that what I have received does not fall on deaf ears, but that I make the most of it, use it, put it into motion, as a way of honouring the one who has given it to me. I receive it with gratitude, and it gives me a renewed vision of who I am: loved, cherished, adopted and renewed”.
The professional counsellor also mentions the verse in Proverbs 19:8, which says that “he who has understanding loves his soul” because “there really is a healthy way to love one another, but it comes through the understanding and wisdom that only God provides”.
“He is the one who really knows us, sees us as we are, and can help us to have a better vision and a right appreciation for us. Nothing like the gospel of Jesus both humbles us and lifts us up, but it is by the work of another, not by our own merits. That is the great paradox that fuels truly good self-esteem”, the psychologist concludes.
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