Happy families

CARL LEWIS was one of the most extraordinary athletes of all time. The gold medals he won at different Olympic Games, and the world records he set, are remembered by many.

Something known by only a few, however, is that he actually buried his first Olympic gold medal in Los Angeles alongside his father's grave. It was his way of showing his gratitude and affection.

But not everyone has this good relationship with close family members and may even live in despair in the family home.

Many players can't give of their best because their family relationships are a mess and they hardly recognise the problem; they think they can get along fine although there's a problem back home.

What do you think? If things are going badly with those at home, how can they go smoothly with those outside the home? Yes, we can make things look as if all is well.

We go out together, we pull the right faces in public, we say the right things when others are listening...but deep down there's a void, a sense of tiredness.

And many wish they could end the relationship because they think that will bring about the end of the problems. Noway!

Few things have as much influence on a person's performance as their personal problems. And here we're referring to performance on every level: work, plans, relationships, leisure and yes, spiritual things too.

We can search all over for reasons why things fall flat on us; but so often the problem is within ourselves. And family problems have a habit of touching and affecting every part of our lives.

Let me ask you this: how would you rate your relationships out of ten? What about with your parents or similar? Or with your spouse? And your children? What about with your wider family? What's your home like? Is it a place of trust, where people like to come?

Some people get panic attacks just at the thought of having to go home at the end of the day. Does this explain why there are so many roaming the streets, or in coffee shops and amusement arcades simply passing the time?

Let's be real; we can't just point the finger at others. When relationships go sour everyone is partly to blame.

God's will and command for each one of us is that love should reign in our homes. It's primarily up to us to show that love first to others.

God even goes so far as to say that if things go pear-shaped on us, our prayers can be hindered by our behaviour. We've no excuse.

We can't blame our parents, our kids, our spouse... If we've not done our best to get things sorted (and many don't) then we are also to blame.

Remember that we can't hope for things to be OK within us if they are not OK at home.