Miguel Lara and Rosa Burguera of the band Sal150 have written a book about mourning the loss of their 22-year-old daughter.
Anna Lara Burguera died a year and a half ago at the age of 22 and the news shocked the Spanish evangelical community.
Her parents, Miguel and Rosa, founders of the Christian band Sal150 (Psalm 150), had already lost their three-year-old son in a swimming pool accident in 2013.
Despite their grief, the couple continues to tour Spain using their art as a therapeutic tool.
Spanish news website Protestante Digital talked to them during their presentation in a church, where they shared their testimony, some of their songs, and a new book they've written with the title A f* shit: Living the grief with hope.
Question. How are you coping with this difficult grieving process?
Answer (Miguel). We decided to go through the mourning without masks, as we are. Sometimes we are told the cheap slogan that if you are a believer, everything will be fine, but it's not like that. Thank God we have had the support of many friends.
We are not superheroes.There are days when we are very sad, when we feel we are struggling to live, but there we are. Although there are many unanswered questions, we are sustained by faith, even if it is little, it is enough to be able to be here today and share our situation.
People can succeed at anything, but without faith, you have nothing. Faith doesn't take away the pain, but it helps you know that one day it will pass and we are in that process. It helps us to be able to keep singing and enjoy the simple things in life.
Q. How did the idea for the book come about?
A. (Miguel) Someone at our daughter's funeral told us very effusively that the situation was "a f* shit". That stayed in my head.
(Rosa) One day, Miguel told me that he dreamt about a book we had written that was being displayed at something like a congress where self-help books with very nice titles were sold, but he told me that we were not selling our book, it was on a stand and when he saw the title it said: “A f*shit”
We started to laugh out of a deep sadness, it was supernatural to be able to do so in spite of the pain and the meaninglessness of the moment. There we knew that something higher was sustaining us. As it is written, his peace surpasses all understanding.
Q. How was the creation process?
A. (Rosa) The book came out at the end of August last year. We wrote down each experience in order not to forget what we were living, like a diary.
(Miguel) We had the need to put in words what we felt as parents. Remembering is painful, but at the same time therapeutic.
The first idea was to create a book for ourselves, but in the process, even though we felt naked, we decided to publish it, because the experience could also be useful to others.
Today we are still going through our grieving process, there are so many things we don't understand, but we have decided to continue trusting in Jesus, and our desire is to learn to rest in Him.
There comes a time when you have to order your mind to stop. We don't want to “eat our heads off” any more, we know that God is good and that despite all this, He will continue to work in us. In our life, He has the last word.
Q. In the presentation you talked about the art of Kintsugi and how you related it to your faith.
A. (Rosa) Yes, it is a very old Japanese technique of repairing broken pieces of pottery. They are not thrown away, but rather fixed with gold. A vase, for example, becomes more valuable after the process.
It inspired us to create the song “Scars”; if you are going through difficulties, remember that your value is higher when you go through trials. Faith is more valuable than any mineral and is purified like that gold.
(Miguel) Faith is a gift, a gift that God gives you. If you want it, ask for it. You don't have to be good to get it, in fact, it's within the distance of a little prayer. Remember that He hears us, that's why we are here.
(Rosa) It is necessary to ask for help. Showing our wounds and being vulnerable is vital because people who go through something like that experience feelings of guilt and shame.
It is necessary to talk about any difficult situation in order to find comfort and healing. We know that God has a purpose in all of this.
Q. What advice can you give to parents?
A. (Miguel) Always value your children, don't take time away from them, avoid being so busy with so many activities, work, etc, that you can't enjoy them.
Miguel and Rosa agree that this book allowed them to express their pain, but at the same time, to discover that they have hope.
Those attending the presentation also shared their thoughts about the couple's testimony.
Yeinet Diaz Gómez said: “This is the first time I have come to a Sal150 concert. I lost my father to suicide and it was special for me to be here. Their testimony touched my heart and I learnt about the importance of keeping faith in God, that moved me”.
[photo_footer] A moment of the concert / José Dalberto Vargas. [/photo_footer]
Another attendee, young Sabela Graña, pointed out she was impressed to hear them sing about hope.“I didn't know them, it's a very lively music and I admire them even more for being able to perform it knowing what they are going through. What I take away from this meeting is that example of faith”.
The book can be found in several bookstores and digital platforms such as Amazon.
Sal150 also announced that they will soon be in concert in other cities in Spain.